🐂 “HOW TERTILIZE YOUR FIELD!” — Vintage Minotaur Tee

Whether you’re plowing the land or plundering a dungeon, this rugged tee brings some good-natured barnyard bravado to your wardrobe. Featuring everyone’s favorite muscle-bound minotaur showing off his “field-fertilizing” expertise (and a mysteriously smoldering outhouse), this shirt is guaranteed to raise eyebrows and morale at your next session.

Garment-dyed for that soft, lived-in feel — like you’ve already survived a dozen harvest festivals and at least one fire. The vintage colors and relaxed fit make it perfect for game nights, tavern hangs, or heroic chores around the homestead.

Put simply: it’s built tough enough for a barbarian, soft enough for a bard, and cheeky enough for your party’s comic relief.

⚔️ Product Features

• Sizes S–4XL (Comfort Colors 1717 sizing — even fits beefy minotaurs)

• 100% ring-spun US cotton, pre-shrunk and ready for adventure

• Medium weight (6.1 oz/yd²) for that perfect “armor class of cozy”

• Garment-dyed for vintage texture — no two shirts are exactly alike

• Tubular knit with double-needle stitching (stronger than a dwarven forge seam)

• Relaxed fit, sewn-in label, made in Honduras

🧼 Care Instructions

• Machine wash cold (max 30 °C / 90 °F)

• No bleach — even radiant clerics respect the cotton gods

• Tumble dry low, or hang in the breeze of your nearest dragon

• Iron low if needed

• Do not dry clean — seriously, you’ll anger the spirits of the field